Sunday, September 18, 2005

I'm a bad drunk

Man lately when I drink I'm a total ass. I mean maybe it was always the case and I'm just realizing it. Anyhoo, to Steph and the remaining sober occupants of the car, I apologize for my final display of complete loss of self control as you were leaving. I blame Sarah. Seriously though as I was approaching the car and still had some composure, the Hornsby line was going to be the funniest delivery ever. Unfortunately since I was drunk and I really love myself a lot when I'm drunk, I heard it before I got it out and completely lost it. That was precious from your perspective I'm sure as I slobbered and laughed uncontrollably at something you never even got to hear. I have pictures though and most of them came out pretty good.

Anyway, thanks for coming and partying with me. It was fun before I started acting like an ass.

Leah, once again, I'm sorry you have to be married to me.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

John! You guys were the most amazing hosts ever! You make martinis, Leah makes buffalo dip. I'm in love. Seriously, I'm moving into the kids' placehouse so I never miss a minute of the neighborhood fun. I especially loved it when you drove us around in the stolen golf cart. But since you bought it up...what was Leah thinking marrying such a Hornsby? -Steph

John said...

Honestly, I have no idea. Except that I think she doesn't really need a man so I fill that role nicely.

Diane said...

Thanks so much for an awesome time! chicken dip, golf carts, martinis, fire, bryan adams, glow sticks...what a great party! I have a million mosquito bites though...your "cologne" didn't really work to well. Next time I'm getting smashed.

John said...

I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt and didn't get any mosquito bites. I guess those moquito attractant wipes I gave you worked.

Johnny Virgil said...

dammit, I want to see John hammered.

Sarah said...

Leah, I am sorry you are married to John which then means you had to meet me and then I came to your party and got all sloppy drunk and started using the word Hornsby like it was my job and was acting like a giant a-hole and used the word a-hole in front of your kids and then almost puked when I got home.

Russ, where the eff were you??

russ said...

I was the eff at home, sort of watching the worst movie evar, Alexander. I spent the day doing absolutely nothing, so I was kind of tired.

Sorry, I did wanna come out, but other more productive people didn't finish a project until late and dint wanna go out.

Next time I ditch their asses.

fsfvii

danielle said...

this fire is now one of my new happy place memories. the j-man was dancing like a crazy lion and your old cranky, drunk neighbor drove up in a golf cart with headlights. man i love the lyle.

Lo Lo Lova said...

Wish I was there.

John said...

me too lolo

LizzieDaisy said...

Wow... now I really can't wait to see pictures. You know it's a great party when everyone feels the need to apologize for something. :)