Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Where you was.... Shop Dungs?

A lot of me hurts. The Body for Life program is kicking my ass routinely. I never have time to blog or else I have time but my arms don't work. I have to say however, at this point it looks like it's not total bullshit. I mean it seems like it's going to work if I keep doing for 12 weeks what I've been doing for the first 3 but working out and eating properly is kinda bullshit. Fortunately for you blog reader I haven't been blogging because Body for Life is all I talk about lately and I think the lunch crew is fairly annoyed with me. You guys are fine.

When I run in the morning, which is when I always do the running, I get about 18 minutes into the 20 minute routine before I really start to have to poop. Those last 2 minutes are risky every time I run. Anyway, once I get off the treadmill, sweat erupts from me like old faithful. It seems like gallons are pouring out of me and what happens is my butt cheeks get really sweaty and then I sit on the toilet and I feel like I'm slipping down into the hole because I'm so slicked up. It's not the most comfortable way to poop.

I'm still pretty fat when I look in the mirror. My man-maries are still pretty generous sized. I have lost 11 pounds since December 19th though so somewhere on me there's 11 pounds missing. It's probably mostly muscle and penis weight. Thanks TFG you bastardhead.

Seriously though, it's been almost 3 weeks and everyone has been very supportive of my goal to get through the 12 weeks. Specifically you blog peeps for the words of encouragement, Russ for the homemade protein shakes, Jan for knocking the Smarties tm out of my hand, JackVirgil for talking me down when I try to eat the donuts, Kim for keeping me in protein shakes of a different kind and nutrition bars, Hor've Villchez for listening to me cry about my legs and for walking slower in the mornings to get coffee, the Schaefs for getting me the swimming pass that I still haven't paid for, OK Horiously for walking to GNC and listening to me talk about food and BFL for like her entire life without killing herself and most of all Elb for buying all the stuff I need to keep from cheating and for packing my lunch all the time and everything else.

I'll get back in the groove and post something sooner now that I got this shit by the horns.

10 comments:

Sarah said...

No problem, Shop. I am so proud of you. I don't mind listening to you talk about it nor do I mind the face you make when you try to eat protein cookies. In fact that really makes it all worth it for me.

P.S. Don't succeed so much at BFL that when you take a poop after running you actually slip into the toilet because you no longer have a butt. Just a little word of advice. Elb will probably not fish you out if that happens.

Johnny Virgil said...

I'm glad you're sticking with it. The good thing is when you're down to where you want to be, the maintenance workouts get a little easier. And you can have pizza once in a while without feeling guilty about it.

Beck said...

I HATE the sweaty buttcheek problem! Ugh. Congrats on the 11 pounds, though.

Lo Lo Lova said...

YOu Kick Ass!

Melanie was here said...

Great job John! Keep up the good work and Lo Lo and I will totally take you out for a low carb beer!

slcup said...

Congratulations on the 11 lbs! I wish I felt as free talking about pooping as you do.

russ said...

I'm no longer supportive. You're annoying and I hope you get pudgy again.

Also, you've now guaranteed I'll never, ever, ever sit on the toilet in your house.

John said...

you're just mad at me because I wouldn't admit that you were right about creating a side pot for me during hold'em. While I'm sure you were right, I'm also sure that I'm lazy and my method required you to do the most work. I think that makes me a winner.

russ said...

I'm pissed because somehow I got turned into the poker bazi. Also, because I've been a lazy POS for almost two months and you've been working hard and getting results. Bastard.

russ said...

bazi=nazi