Hi internet friends. I hope you're all having a nice holiday timeframe. We had a lovely dinner and drinks at my mother and father in law's house last night and saw santa claus and took a million pictures and videos and exchanged gifts and had a great time. This morning we had a fantastic brunch at the wondercouple's house, took a few more pictures and videos drank some more alcohol and I rearranged the Merry Christmas blocks on the fireplace to say "Hire My Ass". This was also a very good time and now that we're home relaxing I thought I'd say hi to my internet friends and write a few letters a la the lovely Sarah. So here you go.
Thank you for being an "educational" company that misspells skool. Good work on that.
Thank you for making the awesomest bulldozer ever and for keeping my son from being a whiny biatch for like 45 whole min.
Shake-N-Go Racers tm are awesome, your packaging however, is not. Thank you for the 4 lacerations, 3 broken eardrums, 2 minor eye abrasions and the anal tear. Maybe you don't have kids but when it takes 37 hours to get the Racers out of the package, kids get all kinds of effing crazy. Stop with the goddamned razor wire twist ties already. Jesus H Christ.
Dear Home Depot/Toys R Us assembly instruction writer,
That's all for now, thanks for reading the blog this year. It's almost been one whole year since I started. I know the quality isn't always there but at least the quantity isn't there either so even though the stuff I write sucks it lately at least I don't write that often.